I hate fees

So what am I doing to aid me in my apartment massacre? I'd call it hunt, but that would mean I was cunning and efficient. I'm more like floppy and disoriented.

Here's a little recap of today's massacre:

- I've done what equates to no work. Why? Because Every five minutes I refresh Craigslist like a crazy person hoping that I'll be the first to call a real no-fee apartment landlord. This never happens and I keep feeling pretty much neglected and abused and sometimes ashamed.

-If I hear the word negotiable in regards to fee one more time I'm going to start eating brokers whole. I'm serious.

-We paid 225 dollars for Rentdirect.com, which hopefully will provide me some relief in all of this. Give me ONE apartment that doesn't have the toilet in the middle of the kitchen. PLEASE.

-Found out that jelly goes bad. ew.

And the score?

Alvaro 0 Amir 3 Real Road Style Apartments 24

Don't warn the tadpoles!

Some people (of course the ones that haven't watched it in its entirety) make fun of me for loving, no ADORING Buffy The Vampire Slayer. I'm sure I'll be writing reasons why in the future. But I just couldn't resist coming back and placing one of my favorite scenes from its seventh season.

I have a friend whose stubbornness with what he would watch was unnerving. He broke down after I threatened to stake him with a bread stick and agreed to watch the entire series run with me.

We're on episode 5 season seven.

Enough said.

Although, ever try to explain the story lines to friends? Yeah.. I wouldn't either.

Thought I'd make friends with time

There's not enough time left.

I want to see as many countries as I can
I want to learn another language -because the more people I can make understand me the better
I want to learn to play guitar, it's far too hot to leave on my bedroom floor
I want to write more. Through this blog, through other means.

The list goes on. I'm now 25. 25! When the hell did that happen? Taking myself back a few, ok ten (fuck ten!) years I remember starting highschool scared out of my mind. Now I'm getting that same "pee my pants" feeling as I look for an apartment.

What the HELL is wrong with the NYC rental market? I'll touch on that when it's not 12:32 a.m. and I haven't spent the entire waste of day that is Tuesday talking to a few Amirs (alot of property managers are named Amir.)

Amir can suck my dick. But please let me rent an apartment!

Assholes.

Good book is missing some pages

In the proccess of looking for some interesting Websites today I came a cross this great idea.

Basically it's a sort of book bartering system. You enter into a database books that you are willing to send to somebody who needs it. For every book you place on the list, you receive points. I'm still trying to figure all of this out, but I'm liking the idea.

There are some books I refuse to part with of course, but it's a great way to get some of the books I've been waiting to read.

Particular these three
- Hero by Perry Moore
-Golden Compass
-East of Eden

Girl disappearing

Harsh but interesting. Found on dlisted and dailymail.

British woman banned from entering New Zealand because she is too fat

The Moneymaker

Moving to NYC, I’ve made some research on taxes and how financially raped I’m going to be. Working in international education and study abroad I’ve also had to keep aware of how bad the dollar is getting in comparison to other currency for students going abroad.

I came across this Website that housed an independent documentary on taxes In the USA. Some things they touch on:

- Dollar is becoming the tiny David among the economic goliaths
- Federal Bank is not even a government owned agency
- What is money? Is it real?
- How powerful is the government in relation to our individual rights as American Citizens?

I’ve never looked at economy or rights too much. Hell, I’m not a big politics junkie. Even so, this documentary unnerved me.

The chill-inducing moment from this?
“The constitution is just a goddamn piece of paper.” George W. Bush

Wow…

Choose me

My main problem of the TV season (besides my love/hate relationship with Heroes) is - What the hell happened to Grey's Anatomy?

If I remember correctly, Grey's was a mid season replacement for abc. It was on a Sunday in the time slot that Brother's and Sister's is now.

The commercials for the show featured a song by the Postal Service, its skittering pulsating beat marching an impression into my brain that this show was going to be about 20 something surgical interns, the ones (like me) suffered from that newly "discovered" quarter life crisis. Only they would all be ridiculously hot.
Although I do admit I groaned at the thought of having one more damn drama focusing on a freaking hospital.

Yet being the unabashed TV junkie I still watched it. After all, it was after the deliciously campy Desperate Housewives. I ended up LOVING it. The writing was sharp, funny, introspective.

The characters were likable and going through some of the same things I felt as someone in my 20s (except in a much grander scale.)

For me the show started faltering in the second season finale. A prom in a hospital.. SERIOUSLY? It started to become ridiculous. I mean it was never completely realistic but at least it saddled the WTF/Ok I can live with that fence.

Then the third season came. Oh boy, the third season. Where Meredith tried to drown herself so that Mcboring could save her, George and Izzy began touching each other no-no spots, and they introduced :drum roll: Meredith's sister! Yes viewers, Meredith's sister was accepted into the same surgical program as Meredith BUT NOBODY BOTHERED TO TELL EITHER ONE!

This season - although better then the last, is just not that good. It went from being a show I was emotionally invested in to a show that the plot holes are so incredibly distracting and the lazy writing is embarrassing.

Also - for the love of Bjork will that show stop making such obvious and lazy parallels between the character's lives and the patient's stories?

Oh yeah, everybody in that hospital is damn nosy.

It's just really disappointing - Let's hope I change my mind soon.

There's really no particular reason for putting Bailey below. She's just badass.

She really loves him

Dina, my London wife left me with this album before she left. Great stuff.

Make it nasty

This is why I needed to change my underwear last Thursday.

Please. Keep making it nasty Amanda.

little four door tramp

And with a sigh of both relief and sadness I let go of my Mazda3.

The circumstances from which this wonderful relationship between me and the car began right after my last car literally gave up on me.

I had a 1995 Volkswagen Jetta. At first I blamed shoddy workmanship for the little car that couldn't get it together. It was quite temperamental. It would shut me out when I tried to close windows to keep out bitter NJ winter cold- which can increase frostbite danger when you factor in driving speeds of 55 +mph. I also remember quite fondly how that German bastard decided to give up on our rocky relationship in the Lincoln Tunnel....at 6:00 p.m... in the middle of rush hour traffic..


After that headache, I needed a new car desperately. I dated a couple of cars that week, the unreliable Ford Focus, the unbearably boring Toyota Camry. I swear when I first saw my little 3 I got hot.

Well, now it's gone and all so I can move to New York and walk around ALL DAY. I particularly can't wait to do the whole 'walking down in the subway in mid July heat' thing. Really.

So here's to you my little 3, I will miss you.

Oysters and History

I need history.

During elementary school, I hated history class. This is mainly because I was sick of hearing over and over again recounts of how a few angry rejected citizens from England threw a bunch of perfectly good tea bags into a big body of water, or that we as Americans supported fabulous white wigs and fabulous ready for the town outfits for both men AND women.

As I got older, memories began to turn into a sort of personal history and I began to feel and see how important it is to record your experiences; eating an entire Breyer's Peach ice cream carton with a friend, that first kiss which made no sense because I was kissing a girl, that first fuck which made no sense because I was fucking a boy etc.

This is why I start this blog; I know I'm one of millions bloggers sitting at their computer/laptop sharing their experiences but this is mine.

I'm moving to New York City. A city so talked about, and reproduced in entertainment that some people say it's overrated, too harsh,.

I'm about to prove them wrong.

I've spent the better part of my 25 years experiencing the unpredictable relationship with that city from afar. Sure, I've been sexually assaulted (ok, guy was just jerking off and then flashed me at the port authority bathroom but I was severely traumatized if not intrigued), peed on (actually pee fell on me at a club from the second floor) and scared shitless (ah the wonderful bar that is "The Cock.") but I always wanted more. I wanted the abuse, it toughned me up and made me the little fucker I am today.

With the abuse comes the realization that I am at the center of the world. Sure, New Yorkers suffer from a slight bit of hubris; but why shouldn't they? New York is the city of 24 hour ANYTHING, a gay boys dream, a career and culture field day. It is also a city that comes together when it needs to no matter how much the outside world tries to dent its progressive nature.

That is why I'm moving there, not because I want to be cool - although having my address say NY,NY makes me cum just a little on the inside - I'm moving there because it is my first love. Cities to me are the best place to find yourself, and lose yourself - and become part of this great social experiment where elderly couples eat brunch next to a power diva and latin drag queen Lola without batting an eyebrow.

It will be quite humorous to read this back as I move through the year from looking for an apartment to my one year anniversary in this crazy place.

The world will be my pee stained, sexually depraved, 24 hour oyster.